report 000007: with the foresight to know

that i knew you had been had before you were through being had.

no. 1 (crooked grin): darling, don't you worry. i pick fights with cowboys sometimes, just for shits. & they love me, o yes, they love my audacity, the spin & prick of it. some wit for their cigarettes. at poker they misread me. i blink a little at this face sometimes: in the mirror, reversal, they see something of me & wish a bit. in reality it's easy to forget this,

snapped & gone/stir crazy; oblivious/blessed. (whistles tunelessly, wanders across the stage. at the far left, sits, swings legs off of stage. takes a string out of pocket: cat's cradle.) isn't it obvious? how we remember, how we make. this meaning in our love, affection of solipsism. progression/digression: moving forward & back in time, our non-linear novel. we pass each other on these tracks, some nights, & stop to light our cigarettes. (we always smoke together.) (puts away string; removes cigarette from case, packs on upturned boot-heel, puts in mouth.) it's much more difficult to regulate when i'm alone: time dilation/compression. pack o' smokes, case of beer: will you join me? might still be drinking alone, but i'll give us the benefit of the doubt. (lights cigarette. exhales.) there's a rhythm in this, a lurch & sway of our ships. pins in our mouths & needles in hand; domestic gods, an episode. in this mission even there need to be interludes. birds in the trees, bring all this weight to bear on/off switch it up, mix a little this night.

my hair is cut, but my boots are still dusty. i've got to go to work, find a job for myself this slip & cut-up morning. there was no rain in the night, but i dreamed of snow & missing flights. i'll get back; maybe when i get that letter, the one with all the questions answered. organ music & cufflinks: i'm getting old. i may buy a snifter for my brandy, but for now i'll stick to whiskey: it lights up my dreams. show-blind in the middle of this field, i hear you in the bleachers - creaking of steps, tromp of boots descending.