fucking cat

the cat ate the goldfish today.

i have no idea how the little bastard accomplished this. the fishbowl is in an cat-inaccessible place. but the little fucker did it. he's been stalking arial for weeks. it was only a matter of time. i thought i had taken plenty of precautions, but he's a wiley sonofabitch.

i walked into the living room to find the cat, staring at me, with a big smirk on his face. as soon as i saw him, i knew something was amiss. the fishbowl was intact, and there wasn't even any water on the floor. except for her little castle, the fishbowl was empty. poor arial. one of these days i'm going to kill that cat. the next time he pisses on my pillow, i'm going to piss on him.

can you have a funeral without a body?